Review for “Fantastic Four”
Score: 3.9π out of 900º
Yesterday I went and saw the movie “Fantastic Four”. The story revolves around a group of 5 people who went up into space to conduct an experiment and ended up getting freakishly mutated.
Obviously, the not-quite-so-fantastic five should have realized the chances of something going horribly wrong and them being mutated into super-heroes, as it happens to so many scientists on a day to day basis. Spiderman, the Hulk… Why can’t the scientists just figure out that if you do a science experiment you’re bound to be stuck serving the cause of justice?
Anyway, all-in-all, this was a decent movie. The movie was able to pass off the mutations in a believable (for movie standards) way. It wasn’t like we were just supposed to accept that this thing just happened in space and that changed them, but they tried to make us feel like there were scientific principles at work or something like that. I respect movies that try to make up science to explain themselves rather than just saying to me “ignore the hows and whys — this person can just do this, okay!?!”
I recommend you go and see this one, if you’ve liked any of the Marvel movies to come out so far. If not, this may not be your cup of tea.
Well, while I’m at it, I’d also like to review the kid sitting behind me in the theater. He gets a solid 0π score. The kid just wouldn’t shut up.
Example:
Man goes to kiss lady, lady turns invisible…
Kid behind me: “Ha! She went invisible, he can’t see her face because she’s invisible.”
Me (muttering): Thank you, Captain Obvious!
Example 2:
Fire Guy: “Flame on!”
Kid behind me: “Look! He said flame on and burst into flames!”
Example 3:
Evil Dude in Movie: “You know what happens when rubber is super-cooled, don’t you?”
Kid behind me: “What does happen when you super-cool rubber?”
Evil Dude in Movie, snapping Rubber Dude’s finger in two
Kid behind me (oblivious to the answers onscreen): “What happens mom?”
The Mom: “Shut the hell up! *Slap!*”
The Mom not in my imagination: “I don’t know honey…”
[All of these were actually said. He had like thirty to forty comments - I'm not exaggerating.]
It was awful. He had to commentate every little thing, ask a billion questions that the movie was promising to answer in two seconds anyway, and just generally remind me how much I hate children.
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